Relationship Counselling & Couples Therapy
“The joining of energies invokes a deep and universal pattern that has unparalleled power. So, conflict is inevitable and cannot be avoided but can be channelled in a way that transforms the relationship rather than destroys it. Whatever your particular sexuality or gender identity, the emotional, psychological and sexual issues are inseparable.” [Duffell & Lovendale]
Relationships can present us with the biggest challenges in our lives. It might be difficult to really talk; you are aware of an increasing distance between you both; a loss of intimacy; absence of desire to make love. Your shared goals might have changed, what first attracted you has become irritating, you might be aware of increasing resentment or other negative feelings between you. Broken boundaries, loss or illness might have impacted one or both of you. Maybe you simply feel stuck.
Counselling is a space where I invite both of you to take an opportunity to talk and express your feelings. By facing each other with genuine and transparent intention, you might find new understanding and ways to communicate in a way that you feel heard. There is always the potential to re-interpret your conflict and transform your relationship into something more solid and realistic in a way that you are both stronger and able to resolve issues together. You possibly do not know where you stand with each other, whether you wish to work together with the goal of staying together, or whether you wish to negotiate a peaceful separation, or no idea either way as you are unable to even talk about this. I make no assumptions as to your goals, they are for you to determine through the evolving process.
Whichever, this is a big step. It is one you both need to come to with a commitment to work between sessions as well as in them. However, by both of you doing so, this is evidence that you are both still care about each other whatever the outcome. Part of my role is to help you gain clarity about what you both want, whether you decide to stay together and makes changes, or to part. I act with both of your interests equally at heart, supporting both of you as we work through your difficulties.
Aspects of the relationship that many couples struggle with include:
I work with all couples whatever your gender combination. I also work with relationships that are other eg; families, work colleague etc.
I am who I am.
Not what you hope me to be.
Not who you think I should be.
Nor who you want me to be.
But simply who I am.